" it is a serious thing
just to be alive
on this fresh morning
in the broken world. "
" I’ve said it before but I’ll say it
again, for the sake of this poem.
I am not the kind of person that
things happen to.
I am not the kind of person that
things happen to, so I make it up.
I draw the dragon and then I
jump on its back.

I take a feeling and I say
‘Do something! Become something!
Help me or go away!’

There’s usually a boy. Sometimes
not. Either way, there’s someone
and they’ve hurt me.
There’s someone and they don’t
love me back,
because that’s what I want. That’s
my poetry.

I’m sorry, you know? I don’t know
what to do with the ones who have
already been here, so I pretend.
I play dolls. I change their names
and their clothes and their stories.

Call me what you want. I know
what the truth is. I know what to
put in between the lines to make it
sting like a real thing.
I know how to make myself better.

Still, I wish I could touch my
own heart instead of writing about
what it must feel like.
I wish I could do anything without
faking it.
What’s left to be honest about,
if not this? What’s left?

When things don’t happen,
I kick up the dirt, I blow on the
dust, I shake the snow globe.
So what if dragons aren’t real?
I bet you wish they were.

  • my friend got me to start watching Orphan Black and it. is. so. damn. good. OH MY GOD. I actually can’t. I can’t even. It’s brilliant and incredible and I’ve watched 6 episodes in 2 days and I don’t think I’ll be doing much else for the next few days besides that and working. I’m at the point where I don’t think I’ve ever watched a show this good. The concept is brilliant, the acting is amazing (Tatiana Maslany is incredible, how she can play all those different roles, and make it seem like there’s 5+ different people,) I honestly cannot deal. If you haven’t watched it, you need to start. Like now. Right now. 
  • Went downtown today with one of my friends and we bought our other friend this beautiful leather journal as a going away present. She’s going away to Cambodia for 3 weeks and we’re going to miss her soooooo much, but we thought we’d get her a going-away present so she has a way of recording all the life-changing moments and experiences there. 
  • Also bought the Lush D’Fluff shaving cream (everyone should buy it - it does the post-shaving-then-cream-application-softness thing without the cream. So soft. No sting that I normally get from shaving cream and no irritation whatsoever. I also got the smashbox photo finish primer, a new anastasia eyebrow pencil, and 2 mac lipsticks. I literally can never shop again. It’s weird doing this much shopping.
  • Excited for the roadtrip, visiting lake louise, seeing my grandparents, but also for the drive and plenty of time to read and listen to music. Thanks to everyone for the suggestions. I would also love more recommendations. Any songs or artists?